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Remember how I blogged about how Google calendars is exposing my email address? It occurred to me that they might be doing the same thing to other users. Aaaaaaand they are. An easy search turns up 18,000 pages of users' email addresses, all exposed on the pages and not obscured even a little bit. It would seem that if you want your calendar to be public, you also have to make your email address public, too.

Why is each individual post-it note pad wrapped in plastic? Are we concerned about germs or something? I could understand if they used post-its during surgery -- "Note to self, drill here --->" ... but honestly, what's with the air-tight wrapper?

James is in San Diego until Thursday, so I'll be spending the next week alternating between feeling lonely and feeling glad that I don't have to clean up after him for a few days.

Cleverly, he put a load of laundry in right before he left, so I won't be able to ask him to help fold.

It's so weird to be watching a show on DVD that was canceled in its first season, years ago, and then suddenly some minor guest appears who is now vastly more famous than anyone else on the show.

Shia LaBeouf, the new Indiana Jones, had a tiny role on an episode of Freaks and Geeks when he was, like, twelve. In the commentary, you can practically hear the regular actors dying whenever he appears.

I can't find a clip of it, so here's Bill dancing for me.

Today, after about two and a half years, I hit my 500th post on SFist. I've updated the "writing" tab on my site's navigation bar, in honor of ... um ... me.

You can probably tell from my tone that I'm really excited to have Richard from Sparkletack starting today on SFist. He's not just some blogger -- he's a real expert in his field, and I can't believe our luck at having him on the site.

A bunch of pictures from Stardust, a movie based on one of my favorite books ever, just went up, and I'm deeply concerned. I know that no movie will ever be as satisfying as the version I've directed over and over in my head. For example, look at this picture:

I have always staged that scene from the other direction -- the lady on the right, the man on the left -- and it's EXTREMELY DISCONCERTING to see them shot from the wrong angle.

Movable Type users, don't forget to update your IP Blacklists to include Spamhaus.

Some topics simply aren't suitable for a public blog, which is why I have my friends-only Vox blog. Add me as a friend on Vox if you'd like to read about my frustrations in a setting to which the public probably shouldn't have access.

So James tried this new Schick Quattro Titanum razor, and oh my God, he's never bled so much in his life, including the time he bit off the tip of his tongue by falling into a bathtub. To the razor's credit, he says, it didn't hurt at all; it was like being sliced to death by painless little lasers.

Why do I mention this? Revenge, I guess. Google-polluting their product's name. That's all.

For the longest time, I couldn't figure out why the Spamlookup keyword plugin wasn't working for me. It would catch the built-in keywords, but it overlooked the keywords that I added. I think I may have figured it out:

Those are the plugin files that are bundled with the MT 3.3 installation. A bunch of them seem to be missing -- according to this page, here's what's supposed to be there:

* Directory: mt/plugins/spamlookup/
o spamlookup.pl
o mt-spamlookup.cgi
o sltool
* Directory: mt/plugins/spamlookup/tmpl/
o comments.tmpl
o config.tmpl
o despam.tmpl
o logs.tmpl
o pings.tmpl
o slfooter.tmpl
o slheader.tmpl
o view_cache.tmpl
* Directory: mt/images/spamlookup/
o nav-viewlog.gif

There doesn't seem to be anyplace online to download those missing files. Argh.

THRILLING UPDATE! As usual, I was wrong. Brad's comment below reveals the true reason it wasn't working. (In my defense, Spamlookup's interface is not totally idiot-proof, so it was left highly vulnerable to me.)

Isn't advertising weird? On the left is the poster for the regular theatrical exhibition of the upcoming Harry Potter film. On the right is the poster for the Imax 3D exhibition, and we do mean 3D.

If you're very observant, you might notice that my bunny's been updated.

Esquire, a magazine for gay lawyers, did this project where they asked famous authors to write stories on napkins. I thought that was pretty cool -- short, clipped, take-only-what-you-need fiction sounds like a nice idea. The results, though, are nearly universally awful:

From Madison Smartt Bell:

"I'm not going to dance with you," she said.

"I'm not going to ask you," Ryan said. He switched the glasses like a three-card-monte dealer. "Bourbon. Champagne. Bourbon."

"Whatever." She picked up the champagne and drank half of it. "This drek music," she said. "God, I hate this song."

"Look at that," he told her. "We do have something in common."

I kept waiting for a punchline, but apparently, the author writes this way on purpose. For comparison, read this excerpt from the unimpeachable Steve Almond:

I reach the registry and I wonder who I should sign in as, just thinking associatively: Miss Pacman, Miss Jackson-if-you're-nasty, Miss Led, Miss Taken, Miss Understood. I choose Miss Chubby Petunia because there's something awful about the hug of this dress.

I slide my finger up a few names and there he is: Ted Nugent, address: The Kingdom of Rock and Roll. Under the comments section, he's added what I take to be a seminal Nugent tenet: "I test drive all meat." A nice choice, really, in the grand scheme. Nicely done.

It's a wedding. I refuse to describe it in detail. I don't know why I'm here. I'm suddenly blurry on particulars. Am I related? Is this a work thing? It doesn't matter. The groom hovers around shaking hands. When there's a lull, a hand shortage, he goes out and finds more and pumps away. The bride's face is deep red, almost purple. She's gasping for breath because her gown is too tight. It makes her look like a giant fishbelly.

Yes, nicely done. I only found one Esquire napkin I liked, and they misspelled "Marty" in the transcription so that now, on first glance, the story appears to have something to do with a soda fountain.

Should I sew it in? James called it "peculiar."

In case you're interested, here's the insanely useful recipe for bread that my mom gave me. Like a Dunny, it's infinitely customizable. For example, I use almond milk instead of real milk, and I use a dairy-free butterish substitute instead of butter (although that means that I have to use less milk, because the fake-butter is wetter than the real stuff). I like to mix almond meal in as well, and also vanilla, or Bailey's if it's been that kind of a week.

To help the dough rise, I filled a sock with rice and sewed it shut; I microwave it for 2 minutes and put it under the bread pans to keep them warm.

white bread

* 6 cups flour (more or less)
* 2 tsp salt
* 3 Tbsp sugar
* 1 package dry yeast
* 3 Tbsp butter
* 2 Tbsp water
* 2 cups milk

1. start yeast (mix yeast & 1 tsp sugar in 2 Tbsp very warm water). Let sit for 5-10 minutes (should get bubbly & increase in volume)

2. heat but do not boil milk (I nuke it for 2 1/2 minutes) in a 4 cup measuring glass. Add the butter and sugar & stir

3. mix salt with 5 cups of the flour.

4. check temp of milk; if too cool, nuke it for 45 seconds.

5. add milk to flour with yeast; mix on mixer for total of about 8 minutes. You can add about 1/2 cup more flour so dough not too sticky. Will add rest of flour as you knead dough on counter. (if whole process by hand, knead about 12--15 minutes)

6. put in greased bowl (turn dough so entire surface is greased), cover with dish towel & let rise for about 1 to 1 1/2 hours in warm place (I put it under a halogen desk lamp raised high- if light too close, you'll dry out the dough surface & develop an icky crust preventing dough from rising nicely).

7. Punch down dough, roll onto counter & knead for a minute. Cover & let rest for 10 minutes (this is actually an important step to develop the right bread texture/crumb)

8. divide dough in half & shape into two loaves. Put into two greased 9x3 pans, cover & let rise for 1 hour.

9. If you want a glossy, professional look, mix 1 egg yolk with about 1 Tbsp milk & brush on dough just before putting in oven.

10. Pre-heat oven to 450. Cook bread for 10 minutes, then lower temp to 350 & cook for 25 minutes more. (Can also just cook at 350 if you think you'll forget to turn down the heat, but I think it makes a nicer crust if started at a high heat).

Do you collect things? I collect profiles on social networking sites. I've got forty or so, and by far, the best messages come from GayRomeo, which is apparently where all of the homosexuals with traumatic cognitive impairment go to flirt. Here's a sampling of unbidden love notes I've received in the past few weeks. I should warn you, it's a bit steamy, in a pinhead-batting-his-eyelashes sort of way.

From: sexyman777
Hello!!!
You likes me very much. And i desided to write you.
My name is Igor and i want to find a man who love sex as i love it.
If you want to know more about me i will be waiting on my mail Igor0707@bk.ru
I'll send you more photo if you want!!

---

From: WetWilly6065
Hi Attractive Matt, welcome to gayromeo; best wishes finding friends and
keeping love. Peace and Good, Bill

---

From: centrpa
in sex, i am very very very oral. i love frenching,,,,69,,,mutual jo and massage,,,,69,,,lots of naked contact>kissing, hugging, cuddling etc,,,,69,,,,,,showering together and making love in the shower,,,,, mutual rimming, while lying on our sides, as we eat and lick each others ass, cock, balls and inner thighs,,,,sleep together naked wrapped together in each other's arms and legs, so we can wake up kissing and grinding our hot cocks and crotches together till we cum on each other,,,,,,,love to mutually eat, kiss, suck, lick>>each other's faces, ears. necks, pits, pecs, cocks, asses, balls, thighs etc,,,,, i love to cuddle naked on the couch and kiss and keep each other warm and give each other pleasure, no pain,,,,, i like to experiment and explore new ways to give each other pleasure......

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From: cowboyITA
Hi American boy,
I am marco and me I am Italian,
I have been to S. Francisco 2000 and me I preserve a beautiful memory of
that city.
Me as you I have a companion from over 5 years and us in this year we go
to cohabit together.
I would like so much to bring my companion in the usa and I look for
therefore kind in the zones where of the friends that even can entertain
us have been.
Then we can reciprocate the hospitality in our new house.
If therefore want to open a friendship are here!
marco

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From: Matou01
Hey guy,
Hummm, very nice your pics my dear.
I would like to chat with you here or others sites.
Please, contact me.
Kissss xoxoxoxo

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From: CM2006
hi, how are you? greetings from the east coast!

---

From: CliftonFuck
LOL well Iknowwhatimdoing too :)

Here's what Amazon's official product description says about the Sony HDR-FX1:

Relive your memories in vivid HDTV quality colors and clarity. This may not be the camera to use for family and touring.

Got that? Amazon wants you to know: THIS CAMERA IS ONLY FOR PORN.

Via Scott:

A new study finds that people with extra testosterone derive pleasure, not fear, from seeing angry faces.

Does this give me permission to just look furious at everyone, with the excuse being that I'm trying to provoke feelings of pleasure? I think it obviously does.

Here's some handy tips for formatting a screenplay.