I'm going to need to stage my own midnapping/murder
July 10, 2009 3:00 PM | 0

 

So, Wednesday. I left my credit card at home, because I ordered a Wii sensor bar at Best Buy, and James was going to pick it up at the store but needed my credit card to do so. (Our original sensor bar was eaten by rats, I'm not making that up.)

So, I didn't have my credit card at work, and I didn't realize until I got to the cashier to pay for my lunch that I didn't have any cash, either. So there I am holding a to-go box of tandoori chicken and no way to pay. They don't take Discover. Of course they don't. Nobody does. Why do I even have a Discover card? Worse yet, why do I have two? I might as well carry that ancient middle-eastern currency that was a 500-pound triangle.

So, I ask the checkout lady, "oh, can I just run to the ATM?" and I left my food there with her. And I scurry off but what am I going to do at the ATM? It won't let me withdraw money against my Discover card (or against a quarter-ton triangle). "Where am I going?" I wondered as I stalked away from the cafeteria.

So, I wind up down the way at a Starbucks, and they do take Discover but their lunchy things are all miserable. Instead of a lovely tandoori I had a tiny chicken salad sandwich that was made out of unhappy chickens. Ten dollars! That's the price of the mass hysteria that is the Discover card. Also, it is the price of not having money.

So, I didn't starve, but I can never go back to the cafeteria again. Or if I do, I'll have to explain why I abandoned food like a common criminal. Drat.

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